Nobody Knows Anything

In just one more example of William Goldman's famous dictum about Hollywood, actress Kiera Knightley acknowledges that she and co-star Orlando Bloom didn't have a clue about the first "Pirates" movie:

Knightley says it wasn't until she was at the premiere of the first "Pirates" movie with co-star Orlando Bloom that she knew the premise would work.

"Orlando and I were sitting next to each other at the premiere, which was the first time I'd seen it, and we'd had a big talk and decided that if it was awful, we'd still leave the theater all smiles," she said.

Heckuva way to make a living, isn't it?

The first of two sequels opens tomorrow and so far, the reviews have been pretty tepid. Like all sequels, this one suffers from the standpoint of being a known commodity and the usual response from the filmmakers is to up the ante in terms of special effects. Judging from the trailer, that's just what they've done.

For now, I'm sticking with my prediction: Like the Matrix before it, Pirates 2 will open huge but ultimately offer diminishing returns and when Pirates 3 rolls around next Spring, people will be wondering why they ever bothered. I'm seeing it tomorrow - I'll let you know if I change my mind.

Update: Saw it yesterday and liked it a lot - it may, in fact, be the most "fun" movie of the summer. It does have much in common with The Matrix sequels (and the Back to the Future trilogy before that) and that represents both the good and the bad news. The good news is that the writers get to expand the characters (yes, there is character development, even in a movie like this) and tell their story on a much larger canvas, as it were. The bad news is that, with so much screen time (and money) to work with, you run the risk of ending up with a bloated mess.

As usually happens with these things, there's a bit of both in Pirates 2.

The real problem with filming two sequels like this is that you're really telling one story - just stretching it to fit two movies. As such, the first hour of this two and a half-hour sequel drags a bit and probably could have been cut by a third, if not half. However, the payoff it builds to more than makes up for it and the movie leaves you with a powerful hook - I defy anyone to not want to see how this comes out in Part 3.

Yes, the CGI is over the top (especially Davy Jones' crew) and some of it works and some of it doesn't. But it's still Johnny Depp as Captain Jack Sparrow who makes the whole thing work. He has created what I would call a new breed of superhero: a heroic buffoon. His Captain Jack is the combining of alter-egos: Superman with horned-rim glasses and a stumbling gait, Batman with a martini in his hand and a blonde on his arm. Believable both in his derring-do and his pratfalls, his lechery and his nobility, his is a character for the ages and worth the price of admission alone.

Go see it. And then mark your calendar for next May.